By Anaël Edery
When I first told people I was moving away for college, the responses were usually the same: “Are you excited?”
Of course I was excited! I was going to Yeshiva University (YU): the school of my dreams, the place where I could see myself growing academically, personally and spiritually. I got to live in Midtown Manhattan and to experience dorm life. I knew there would be challenges, but I also knew that getting to where I wanted to go meant leaving the comfort of home behind. What I did not realize was what “leaving home” really meant.
Deep down, officially deciding to go to YU felt surreal. It was something I knew was coming, but I still felt like it was not going to actually happen. I was so excited for this chapter of my life to start, even though I had no idea where it would take me or what I would accomplish there. I left behind my family, my friends, my usual routine and the little things that made everyday life feel easy and simple. I went from knowing exactly where I belonged, what the future held and who lived beside me, to having to figure out where my life was going, what had to be done and who I had to live with. I had to learn a new city, a new campus and a completely new routine.
Within the first week, I felt homesick; I missed sitting around the dinner table with my family. I missed my friends and the feeling of being around people who had known me for years. I missed the familiarity of my home, where I did not have to think twice about where I was going or what I was doing. But I never saw missing home as a reason to leave. It was part of the sacrifice I was willing to make for something I really wanted. I chose YU knowing that I would have to start over, meet new people and learn how to take care of things on my own. At first, even simple things could feel very difficult. Dealing with my student visa, getting a bank account, understanding school requirements and learning how everything worked took time.
But slowly, those things became normal.
Slowly, I started figuring things out. I learned how to navigate New York, ask questions when I did not understand something and solve problems without immediately calling home. I started becoming more independent without even realizing it.
I am still learning how to balance school, friendships and everything that comes with living away from home. I do not have everything figured out, but I have most definitely become much more comfortable figuring things out as I go. I started creating new memories instead of only missing the old ones. That has probably been the biggest lesson for me: moving away as an international student has taught me how to build something new while still holding on to where I came from.
I still miss home, but I also know how much I have gained from being here. YU challenges me in ways I never expected. It pushes me to grow, not only academically, but also personally. I know that the person I am becoming is worth the adjustment. Sometimes it means taking the subway by yourself when you would much rather have someone drive you. Sometimes it means figuring out a problem on your own because your parents are not right there to help. Sometimes it means spending Shabbat with a new family when you wish you could be sitting at your own table at home. Sometimes it is studying for hours and taking a break without having your parents there to talk to or just sit with. Looking back, I think these are the moments that have helped me grow the most. Uncomfortable moments are the ones that show me how much I am capable of. They have shown me that I can handle things on my own, even when they are not easy.
I came to YU because it was the school I wanted and knew it was worth the sacrifice. This is the life I wanted, and even though it comes with sacrifices, I would always choose it again. I know there is still a lot of work ahead of me before I accomplish my dream of becoming a dentist, but I am willing to put in as much work as needed because I know what I am working toward. Every time I learn something new, meet someone new or accomplish something on my own, I am reminded of the reason I chose to come to YU. I still miss home, but I am also becoming someone who knows how to create a home wherever she goes.
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